I don’t think I’ve ever been propositioned before and it wasn’t exactly how I imagined it. What was I propositioned for you ask? Well… I was at a bar ordering drinks when this lady comes by and starts the usual small talk. No worries, I’ve been in many of these situations so you just play along. Did I mention that she was so not my type (to be politically correct)? Not at all! I’ve never been the type to give a hard rejection so I let her go on as I knew if I wanted to leave, I just need to bring the drinks back to my mates. As I was eyeing off to the bartender to HURRY UP! She said I was cute and asked whether I wanted to get into a threesome. Now HOLD UP! Stop the tape and REWIND!!! A threesome?!?!?!?!? Now that sounds rather interesting providing that there was another lady involved and she was semi decent. When I looked at the other half of her duo, I was extremely unimpressed. It was a really massive creepy bloke that I reckon is into some nasty kinky shit. That’s when I stopped, panicked, shook my head and said no NO NO NO!!! many many MANY times. I think she got the drift by how weirded out I was, so she started to walk away but as she going, she grabbed my ass and told me to come her way if I changed my mind. Only in London I reckon this would happen…. WTF?! Sigh, if only it happens like in the movies….
Apart from the crazy shit that happened to me, turns out Debs herself had her own craziness too. There was this aussie bloke who was some how associated to a friend’s friend of Debs. Clearly he was keen on her but the way he went about was so wrong. He kept giving her the evil eyes, told her that everything she said was bullshit and she wasn’t aussie. After all that he asked to add her on his facebook via his iPhone. Wtf?!?! Don’t tell me this some how works and this guy is able to pull chicks?!?!
Luckily Debs was poised about it and told him that if he didn’t remember her name, then he can’t be on her facebook. Well done Debs… Well done. If it was me, I would have drawn a circle and said, see this circle? this is the circle of friends… YOU, are not allowed to be in this circle so FUCK OFF! He did try to read her palm but that was just out right stupid and a little sad.
He did have a go at me as well (not hit on! you numbnut!) and told me that I wasn’t aussie and kept asking where I came from. Who gives him the right to say who’s aussie or not?! After a heated argument, one of his mates pulled him away and I told his mate that if he wanted a stabbing, he’ll get one tonight. Actually, I did remember telling quite a few people that night so he left no long after. Most people that know me would know that when it comes to insults, I am usually quite blasé about it and I brush it off easily. But this fella definitely takes the cake and he was pushing the right buttons for a kinder surprise… in the shape of a broken glass bottle.
So overall it was a memorable night 
Tags: aussie, broken bottle, bushpig, stabbing, threesome
Leave a Reply